i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
