There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize
