i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
Randomize
