My balls are so social today.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Randomize
