ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
no more duck duck goose at the bar
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Randomize
