His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize