Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
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