You're completely useless in the revolution.
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize