You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
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