yea but for you.
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
19 Movie Extras Reveal What It’s Like To Work With Celebrities
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
you're hired as official boob wrangler