We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
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