So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
Randomize
