she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Randomize