If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
I'm at about main and main street
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Randomize
