Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Randomize
