My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
Randomize
