I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
Randomize
