Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
i used baking grease as lip gloss
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize