conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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