super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize
