I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
I just googled if crying burns calories
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize