Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize
