the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
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