Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Randomize
