There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
