Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
