Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize
