After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Randomize
