did you get engaged???
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
