Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
