I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
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