I'm eating all of the evidence.
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
