But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
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