I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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