you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
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