Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Randomize
