She went from zero to smokin in five shots
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
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