last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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