Non-Jews are for practice
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
