After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Randomize
