but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
Randomize
