i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Randomize
