if i died would you start the facebook group?
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
