Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
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