I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
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