sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Randomize