This girl is more easily done than said...
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
