you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize
