first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS