I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
